Thank God! I am not a celebrity!

Nope. Its not triggered by sour grape feeling!

I really meant it.

I think women celebrities in our country are very unfortunate.  Why?

Because, in the online world, they get celebrated one minute and get virtually molested the next minute. Sometimes, by so many men at the same time. They don't get to share their photos or art work without getting abused (at least once). They can't joke without escaping from someone branding them selfish. They can't express their thoughts/opinions on social media without a comment from "I have a mobile. I have an online account. I follow you. So let me abuse you" category. They can't be human. They can't make mistakes. They can't celebrate their success. They can't be like you and me!

Thanks to FB & Twitter.

In the last couple of months, I got to witness certain such online experiences that some of our very talented women celebrities have encountered. These experiences have really made me wonder about the sensitivity and sensibility of the living generations! Yes, I said generations. From 15 year old boy to 70 year old man. Surprise! I can see all these abuses mostly from mars citizens! (Where art thou, Venusians?).

Don't get me wrong. The intention is not to blame one gender. But, to highlight the pattern that, such abuses seem to be primarily coming from the common man (men)!

So, who is this common man? If you look at their profiles, they are as normal as a normal person can be! They are someone's husband, brother, son, father, making a livelihood through some business. They love to visit celebrity profiles and leave their "mark" on that page. Well, what else did I expect them to be? Sigh!

This makes me wonder aloud, where, as a society are we going wrong? How do the men in our society end up with a thought that, they can abuse a celebrity online, the way they want and get away with it? What sheer pleasure are they getting by this "peek-a-boo" fantasy bullying? Does this make them feel empowered as "men"? Is that the psychological trigger behind those loose comments and idiotic one liners? Or is it coming from a space of jealousy with regard to the talent, money and the inferiority complex around it?

Well...

I can only wonder as I have neither answers nor solutions to this "not making sense" behavior of the fellow human beings.

Meanwhile....

I take a bow, ladies - for your talent, courage, wisdom to focus on positivity, ability to spread that wisdom and thriving to be successful and confident in this "maya" called celebrity worship!


PS - Thank God! I am not a celebrity!








 

Grey hair? - Ohhhh! Poor you!

Disclaimer: All the incidents mentioned here are purely incidental. Any resemblance to you or your dialogues or situations is purely co-incidental!

You can completely empathize with me if you have heard the following dialogues from some good soul in your circle at least once...

"Oh no! Grey hair?? You are sooooo young!!"
"Oh no! Why don't you colour it?"
"Poor you! in few years...you may look very old. why don't you try something?
"So many grey hairs? What are you doing about it?"
"I think you are stressed. Hence, so many grey hairs!"
"Try this oil..."
"Apply mehendi"
"Check with a doctor"

The never ending concern around the attack of the monster called "grey hair" never fails to amaze me. Especially when I am least concerned about it! (btw I am the one attacked by THE monster here!)

While I enjoy the attention I get, I do contemplate internally whether to respond or not.

Should I explain, why I have grey hair? (I swear, I am as clueless as you. But I can cook it up!)
Should I explain, why I am not concerned about it? (Oh God...what if they don't get convinced?")
Should I explain, why I am comfortable with not trying anything? (Well...how can I say that without trying anything? I should have been uncomfortable sometime by trying it to say I am comfortable with not trying it!)....sigh!!

So, here I go at the end of the contemplation - explaining the answers for all the above questions, to my well-wisher(s)! (each and everytime!)

In the last couple of months, I have gone through this vicious cycle of being noticed for the monstrous attack which has made me wonder...

To have or not to have!

PS: Poor me!
PPS: "To have or not to have" seems to be as intense as "To be or not to be"
PPS: Color of hair is the only thing we can choose #justsaying!





 

Shame, shame, puppy shame!

I remember how we used to cringe in our childhood days when some peers used to sing this "shame" song standing around us, in those rare occasions of  certain "slipping" from our side. And we would have been part of that singing band at some point to bestow the shamefulness on some poor soul around us.

Have we ever let go of this habit?

While it may seem like from outside.. unfortunately as "educated" and "civilized" grown up adults, we still carry this song and sing it. Well..in our head!

As a practitioner of psychotherapy, I get to hear this "song in the head"  of others more often.

In our society, while we may treat every "body related illness" from fever to cancer as it is, why do we struggle to acknowledge the illness called mental illness as it is?

Is it due to the lack of education around what causes mental illness?

No.

It is our lack of readiness to get educated.
It is the immovable stigma that we attach to this illness.

It is absolutely possible for someone's brain or mind to get wounded the way our hands and legs get hurt!

Unfortunately, the societies "illness" called stigma, causes more damage to the affected person and the people around.

Remember, no ones wants to live with depression. Everyone wants to have a happy and successful life and they deserve it.

Hence, we could make this place a much better place to live for our fellow human beings, if we could remember:

- Mental illness is not the "person's" fault (they don't want it either!)
- People who have mental illness are not "weak" in character
- They definitely deserve unconditional love and support.
- Hiding their illness from the society is not the "solution" to cure it.
- All those people who approach counselors and therapists need not be branded as "mentally ill"
- Judging the people with mental illness without proper knowledge about the illness is the worst damage that can happen to them.

In the current era of over-flowing information, let us make use of the technology and human network to increase our awareness about what we don't know...especially related to mental illness!


How about starting this awareness by getting rid of the "song in our head"??

Shame, shame, puppy shame...